Wednesday, June 25, 2014

i just want to be okay with how i look

In exactly three months I will begin nursing school at the University of Washington in Seattle (I still cannot believe I am going to be a husky. Ughh! #gocougs). That means I have three months to make a habit out of clean eating, exercising, and blogging about my journey.  My thought is that if I can make a lifestyle change now, it will be much easier while I'm in school to make smart food choices and incorporate exercise into my daily routine.  I am not going to sell myself short - I have already gotten much better with my food choices and I have found enjoyment in running again (stop laughing, I'm actually serious!).  I just need to carry this forward and keep getting better!  I was thinking of ways to stay motivated and I had this crazy thought that I would take a picture of myself and watch my progress. People do that all the time; they post their pictures on the internet for the world to see and get super positive feedback. Great plan up until the moment that I took a picture of myself.

What. THE HELL. Has happened to me?!

Please PLEASE know that I, in no way, think that I am obese or anything like that.  But for a former college athlete and a girl who used to work at the Y - there is no denying that my body has changed.  Of course I have my excuses: I'm in school while working full-time, I would rather hang out with the Hubs than spend hours at the gym, I think sugary and salty things taste good and I like foods that are not good for me.  I mean, I am human for goodness sakes.

Can't deny it.  I'm 100% an emotional eater!

So what do I do?  Ultimately I just want to be okay with my body.  I want my heart and lungs healthy.  I want my legs to be strong.  A washboard 6-pack stomach wouldn't hurt but let's not get ahead of ourselves.  I think I need to redefine success for my body.  This time last year I was moping around because I had inflamed my IT band and running wasn't even an option.  Isn't that success right there?!  Duh! Of course it is!


Okay so maybe I won't be posting this week's body photo on here but I did take two that I will use as my personal motivation going forward. Someday, when I'm really brave I'll post them. I think it's okay to remember the glory days of college swimming but I cannot keep living in the past.  I have grown up (and a little out) since then. And THAT just needs to be okay.  As long as I stop the bad behavior now and work toward better, cleaner, healthier living. After all, my body has a story.  It's been through a lot.

It's really scary and uncomfortable talking about this stuff.  I am totally a victim of the "I care what others think about me" curse.  It sucks.  I just do not think I am alone out here; I know I'm not.  There are plenty of former college athletes that have let life happen to them just as I have.  My goal is simply to share my experience and hopefully help motivate at least one person along the way.

I'm ready to be okay with how I look...

---

And because we all need to laugh to stay sane, I am introducing the IRREVERENT AND FUNNY PICTURE OF THE DAY (IaFPotD).

IaFPotD for June 25, 2014:




No comments:

Post a Comment